Summer has started! This means a 3 month break from Uni..
Which is great, of course.
However it does make me wonder why we’re all spending so much money on being (or mainly not being) in University. English students are paying £9,000 for those few hours a week in Uni (Ok, this mainly applies to social science students) about 8 months a year.
Now I’m definitely not complaining about having time off, after those exams I feel it’s well earned, but here is a list of things that £9,000 could alternatively buy, if we weren’t all busy not being at uni this past year..
1. Two weeks in this luxury Maldives hotel
Ok, so two weeks might seem far worse value for money than 8 months of the year in uni but seriously, just look at it!
The massage tables at the Gili Lankanfushi hotel have glass floors beneath them, because of course no spa treatment is complete without the sight of tropical fish swimming around beneath your sweaty (but relaxed), privileged face. Naturally if you want anything else whilst having your massage and watching the real life Nemo in 3D then have no fear.. the 24 hour butler is less than a bell ring away.
2. 10 Google Glass
For the price of one year at uni, you and 10 of your friends could get Google Glass, at an estimated £890 a piece. Who needs a degree when you can know anything in the world with a blink?!
3. 11,842 Gregg’s sausage rolls
Just think how gloriously unhealthy you could become if only you had not been at uni this year.
4. This VW Camper Van
For the price of £9000 you could bag yourself this 1972 bay and travel the world. Wish no more to be a punk rocker with flowers in your hair and simply embrace the dream.
5. 6 Flats in Crete…
6 holiday homes in Greece for the same price as 1 year at university. If you’re going to be sitting on your arse all year, you may as well be doing it in the sunshine.. with 5 friends.
7. Entry for 1,500 people to Cab Vol on a Friday night
You would have to be feeling pretty generous but if the £9,000 was to spare, the option is there. Alternatively that’s 1,500 weeks worth of Cab Vol entry. So that’s friday nights full of unrecognisable music, sweat and Pacman covered for the next 4-and-a-bit years.
8. (A measly) 31 six-litre bottles of Belvedere Vodka
*tiny dog not included
This massive bottle will rob you of £285.75 of yo’ hard-earned dolla’ (Because £285 just isn’t quite enough). That being said, with a bottle this size (as demonstrated by Brandy, the world’s smallest dog), I doubt you’d remember whether you had spent the year in University or not.
9. (And if you want to spread your money that much thinner) 562 bottles of Glen’s Vodka
Glen knew what he was doing with his cheapo vodka… but you won’t after 562 bottles. Just try not to go blind.. it doesn’t take 562 bottles for a dodgy little slice of newsagents special vodka for this stuff to be lethal.
10. Then last but not least, there’s always the option of 75 Camels
How could you really resist?