To fund my way through Sixth form and University I’ve been through a few retail jobs in my time.
Working in retail does have its advantages- who doesn’t love discounted clothes? I’ve met some amazing people working in retail and I have been more enthusiastic over a pair of old men’s loafers than I would ever have thought possible. However, the retail life was not for me and I’ve compiled a list of 15 reasons why working in retail is generally just a bit shit.
1. Customers trying to change the price
We are not in a Bazaar, this isn’t the middle east, stop trying to haggle with me.
2. Standing up aaaalll day long
My back aches, my legs ache, my soul aches, people are not made to stand still for this long.
3. Working weekends
It’s sunny, everyone is out having a barbecue and you’re in work. Even better when it’s late night shopping..
This also results in speed drinking to catch up with your friends when you finally finish work which is guaranteed to end disastrously.
4. Messy customers
You’ve just finished folding a heap of jumpers into a neat little pile that would make an OCD sufferer jump for joy (3 times) and then someone comes along, picks them all up and proceeds to drop them all messily back down again.
They usually don’t end up taking a jumper.
5. When someone tries on something revolting and you lie through your teeth to try and reach your targets.
Of course, leopard print suits everyone!
6. Customers returning something they were clearly out clubbing in the night before.
7. The shop playlist will destroy your soul..
..and you will end up singing or humming songs from it in the shower or waking up with it stuck in your head.
This is especially mind numbing at Christmas time.
8. Having to smile all day long
And then refusing to smile all evening so that your muscles have time to recover for the following day.
9. People that come in five minutes before close and want to try something on.
Don’t make me do something I’ll regret.
10. When there are no customers, everything is tidy and there is nothing to do.
You end up walking around the shop adjusting hangers and basically just stroking clothes for four hours.
11. Spending all of your hard earned pittance of a wage on clothes.
50% off and it was still a whole day worth of pay.
12. Time slows down.
Checking the time after what feels like hours and realising that it’s only been ten minutes.
This is especially traumatic when working on accessories where watches with the wrong time give you false hope.
13. Having to attempt an up-sell when someone obviously just came in for socks.
I already know that you don’t need a dress to match those socks, I’m sorry, it’s not my fault.
14. Bossy Coworkers.
You have no authority over me, please stop telling me what to do.
15. Pretending to know the exact manufacturing process of the Italian leather those shoes are hand stitched with.
I don’t know where they come from and I really don’t have a pair at home.
And that was me done…
All gif’s: giphy.com